I should never have given Tommy that butterfly net. I just thought that a boy his age, 9, would love the fun and excitement of chasing lizards all over the Florida landscape. When I was his age, my parents took me on a vacation to the Bahamas and there were lizards all over the place. All I wanted to do was chase them around and try to catch them. Naturally, that’s like trying to put a size 9 foot into a size 3 shoe…. impossible.

When I saw my son chasing lizards here, in Florida, I just knew that he should have a better time of it than I did. At least, with that net, he’d have a chance to actually catch one, something that never happened for me. 

And so, I gave him the net and a plastic container to store his catches, with instructions not to run into the street while chasing lizards or do anything dangerous, to be aware of his surroundings, and to make sure he was in a safe place at all times. Of course, he promised, but I got the distinct feeling that he wasn’t paying too much attention to me, eager as he was to get outside and onto the hunt.

Carla, my wife, was out shopping for god knows what, but she’d be out all day, I was sure, because she was with her friend, Marcie. She knew that I was good with Tommy and left early that morning, with promises of us all going out to dinner when she returned.

I had just received a third notice from my publisher, who told me in no uncertain terms that I was to submit the revisions of my article by 5 o’clock today, no excuses, no further delays, OR ELSE! I knew he meant it too, so I was determined to chain myself to my computer until I was finished and had that job off of my mind. It never occurred to me that I needed to be watching Tommy closely. He was really a great kid and followed directions, almost always. 

So, I started to work. At first, I didn’t notice the commotion outside. It just entered my mind as background sounds, not really getting my attention. But then, I realized there was a lot of yelling out there and the sounds of many people running. It didn’t seem right. We lived in a really peaceful neighborhood, where everything was usually calm and quiet. 

I went to the front door and opened it, expecting, I don’t even remember what, but certainly not what I saw. Mrs. Abrams, my next-door neighbor came running down the street, in a bikini, not a sight anyone would want to see, that’s for sure. 

Not only was she running, she was screaming, “You’d better keep running you little monster, because if you stop, you’ll never run again!” 

Who was she chasing? Well, at first, I wasn’t sure. My neighbor from four doors down the street, John Abernathy, was in front of her, chasing the same person. John’s face was covered in shaving cream. 

Two or three other neighbors were in the same chase. Then, I saw what it was they were chasing. It wasn’t a “what” they were chasing, it was a “who,” and the who was my son, Tommy, clearly terrified and running at top speed, keeping ahead of the crowd. 

So, what else can a father do? I joined the chase, yelling at people to stop chasing my son. 

Now, let me stop this narrative here for a moment to fill in some important information. Remember, it all began with my giving Tommy the butterfly net to try to catch some lizards and that’s what caused all of the commotion.

Let’s start with Mrs. Abrams. Tommy had been looking for lizards to catch. He kept trying to get one, but they were too fast for him, even with his net. Then, he saw a really beautiful, big, and what looked like a lazy one, on Mrs. Abrams privet hedge. He was sure that this was the one he was going to catch, but when he got closer, the lizard went around to the other side of the hedge.

Mrs. Abrams had been enjoying the privacy of her back yard, doing some sunbathing, lounging topless, and enjoying a glass of chardonnay, when she saw some movement by her shrubs. Suddenly, Tommy’s head appeared through the hedge. He was looking for the lizard. What he got was a hysterical scream from Mrs. Abrams and a good look at what shouldn’t be seen by a boy his age. 

Really frightened by the whole experience, Tommy pulled his head out from the hedge as quickly as he could and started to run. He didn’t really know where he was running, but he wanted to get away fast, and, stumbling as he went, he didn’t realize where he was headed. 

Mr. Hart, a neighbor from down the street, was taking his dog, Jojo, for his afternoon walk. Tommy tripped on Jojo’s leash, which pulled out of Mr. Hart’s hand, and freed Jojo, who immediately high tailed it down the street. 

“Stop! Jojo, come back here,” Mr. Hart shouted.  Then, he began to chase the dog, but not before yelling at Tommy, “Once I get her, I’m coming back. I’m coming after you!” Tommy’s a smart kid and knew that the best thing to do was to get out of there as fast as he could, which is what he did.

 After he had calmed down a bit, Tommy realized that the sun was still hot and lizards were still basking in it, and he had only caught two so far. Why should he give up? There was still time and there were lots of lizards around. He was going to get lots more of them, no matter what.

Tommy started stealthily hunting for another lizard. Unfortunately, he began hunting in the backyard of the Morrisons, who live just one block from our house. He knew them very well because he often played with their son, Malcolm. The boys often spent time in the Morrison’s greenhouse, a truly spectacular glass structure in their backyard, and something the whole neighborhood was proud of. They raised a variety of exotic flowers inside and shared many of them with their neighbors. 

So there Tommy was, sneaking up on a beauty of a lizard, right next to the greenhouse.  Slowly, he inched up to where he could reach the lizard and whipped the net back to catch it. Unfortunately, he pulled the net back a bit too far, in order to get good momentum. When he did that, he lost his balance and hit one of the large glass panes in the greenhouse. The glass shattered, which would have been bad enough, but some of the glass cut a watering hose, and water started pouring all over the greenhouse and Mrs. Morrison, who was working in there at the time. 

“It’s all right.  I’m not hurt,” Tommy said. Mrs. Morrison lost it. She started throwing things at Tommy, which caused him to run out of the yard and into the street.

When he reached the street, Mrs. Abrams, now wearing all of her bikini, saw him and started chasing him. At the same time, Mr. Hart, who was tugging at Jojo, now attached to his leash, saw her chasing him and joined the pursuit. Mrs. Morrison managed to get out of her house in seconds and not only chased Tommy, but she had a basket of tulip bulbs over her arm and she started throwing them at him. All of these people, plus a few others, were chasing Tommy and screaming at him when I went outside to see what all of the commotion was. 

As I said earlier, I joined the chase. “Stop, stop. That’s my son. Stop! Wait! Please..” and then, it happened. We all stopped all right, but not because I was yelling and pleading.

Suddenly, there was a brilliant, blinding light overhead. It literally stopped us in our tracks. Then we heard a loud humming noise, like a quiet, but powerful motor and then something came out of the sky and landed in front of the whole crowd, including Tommy. 

I know this sounds incredible, impossible, if you will, but it was some kind of a space ship. It landed slowly and so quietly that it didn’t seem possible that this was really happening. But I’m telling you, it was happening. 

After a few short moments, a door in the side of the ship opened and a ramp lowered to the ground. This sounds unbelievable, right? But it’s true. And then, some thing came out of the doorway and walked down the ramp. It was like nothing I’ve ever seen, and yet it was like things I’ve seen all of my life. It looked like a giant lizard, wearing a space helmet. It didn’t have on any clothes, just that helmet and some kind of backpack. 

It was carrying something in its claws that looked just like, if you can believe it, Tommy’s butterfly net, only it was huge. The creature scanned the group of us and walked over to Tommy, who was still holding his container filled with lizards, and, so quickly that I didn’t even realize what it was doing, it whipped that net over Tommy, scooped him up, and carried him into the space craft.

About three minutes after that, while we were all immobilized by the impossibility of what was happening, the ship lifted off and disappeared into the sky. That was the last time I saw my son. Tommy is somewhere out there, in that spaceship, and who knows what they’re doing to him.

And that, doctor, I swear, is what happened to my son. I had witnesses who could explain it the same way, but everyone in the neighborhood seems to be pretending that this never happened. The police think I’ve done something to my son, but it’s not true. I loved Tommy and still do, but he’s somewhere out in space, on that lizard’s ship. Honestly!

Do you think I can go home soon, back to my neighborhood? I’ve been in this hospital for a long time, and Tommy could be coming home any minute.